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第12部分(第3/6 頁)

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together and gave them a pattern deserving of the term living。

In days I was back on my bike。 For the first time in my life; I rode with real strength and stamina3—and purpose。 。。

難忘的時刻(3)

The second moment arrived along with the birth of my son Luck。 I grew up without a father; he left home before I was able to walk。 So I vowed that if I ever had a child; I would be there for him in every way—the whole way。

Because of cancer; having a child would obviously not be easy。 I had my sperm frozen。 Kristin had to have an operation; and Luke was conceived by in vitro fertilisation。 He developed normally; but Kristin had trouble during the delivery4。 The baby was in crisis and doctors had to use forceps。 He was tiny; blue; not crying and his lungs weren’t filling with air。 So they grabbed him from Kristin; whisked him into a side room; put a mask over his face and pumped air into his lungs。

I remember I was just standing there helpless; Kristin looking at me; asking; “What’s wrong? What’s wrong?”And I didn’t have any answers。 I could see the doctors working; yet I was helpless。 I have been through lot of scary stuff; but that topped everything。

Medical personal dashed in and out of the room。 I was thinking;“Cry; please cry。” I was petrified。 At that moment I would have done anything just to hear him scream。

Then I saw them remove the mask。 He opened his mouth and scrunched5 his face and let out a big; strong “Whaaaaaa!”

It sounded like the wail of life。 I had wanted to show him; but he had just shown me; that life was about staying tough。 You fight to go on。

Cancer was the making of me: through fear and pain I became amore passionate6 and intelligent man; husband and father—and therefore a more alive one。

I r

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