第18部分(第3/7 頁)

und　which　lulls；　and　tunes　the　mind　to　calm　thoughtfulness。

I　have　a　letter　to…day　from　my　old　friend　in　Germany；　E。　B。　For　many　and　many　a　year　these　letters　have　made　a　pleasant　incident　in　my　life；　more　than　that；　they　have　often　brought　me　help　and　fort。　It　must　be　a　rare　thing　for　friendly　correspondence　to　go　on　during　the　greater　part　of　a　lifetime　between　men　of　different　nationalities　who　see　each　other　not　twice　in　two　decades。　We　were　young　men　when　we　first　met　in　London；　poor；　struggling；　full　of　hopes　and　ideals；　now　we　look　back　upon　those　far　memories　from　the　autumn　of　life。　B。　writes　to…day　in　a　vein　of　quiet　contentment；　which　does　me　good。　He　quotes　Goethe：　〃Was　man　in　der　Jugend　begehrt　hat　man　im　Alter　die　Fulle。〃

These　words　of　Goethe's　were　once　a　hope　to　me；　later；　they　made　me　shake　my　head　incredulously；　now　I　smile　to　think　how　true　they　have　proved　in　my　own　case。　But　what；　exactly；　do　they　mean？　Are　they　merely　an　expression　of　the　optimistic　spirit？　If　so；　optimism　has　to　content　itself　with　rather　doubtful　generalities。　Can　it　truly　be　said　that　most　men　find　the　wishes　of　their　youth　satisfied　in　later　life？　Ten　years　ago；　I　should　have　utterly　denied　it；　and　could　have　brought　what　seemed　to　me　abundant　evidence　in　its　disproof。　And　as　regards　myself；　is　it　not　by　mere　happy　accident　that　I　pass　my　latter　years　in　such　enjoyment　of　all　I　most　desired？　Accident……but　there　is　no　such　thing。　I　might　just　as　well　have　called　it　an　accident　had　I　succeeded　in　earning　the　money　on　which　now　I　live。

From　the　beginning　of　my　manhood；　it　is　true；　I　longed　for　bookish　leisure；　that；　assuredly；　is　seldom　even　one　of　the　desires　in　a　young　man's　heart；　but　perhaps　it　is　one　of　those　which　may　most　reasonably　look　for　gratificat