第5部分(第3/6 頁)

　his　list。　“That’s　the　bulk　of　your　work　done。　All　that　remains　is　for　you　to　decide　what　you　want　to　do　about　all　these。”

He　started　by　saying　good…bye　to　the　things　he　didn’t　favour：　wife；　children；　elderly　father；　drooling　dog。　The　family　home　he　sold　at　a　handsome　profit；　which　allowed　him　to　pay　off　both　wife　and　hefty　mortgage。

His　job　was　next　in　line：　early　retirement　on　the　grounds　of　ill　health。　Then　he　went　to　live　in　a　small　apartment　in　Torremolinos；　where　he　could　indulge；　all　year　round；　in　the　two　items　on　his　list　of　preference：　golf　and　windsurfing。

If　he　wasn’t　entirely　happy；　he　was　at　least；　at　last；　in　therapeutic　parlance；　true　to　himself。

Two　years　later　he　was　back　in　London　receiving　treatment　for　depression。

Others　別人（3）

“This　therapist　is　no　good　at　all；”　he　plained　to　me。　“She　says　my　problem　is；　I’m　too　selfish。　If　I　did　something　to　benefit　other　people；　my　health　would　improve　dramatically。　That’s　a　plete　contradiction　of　what　I　was　taught　before！”

“How　can　I　do　both？”　he　exclaimed　despairingly。　“Benefit　others　whilst　remaining　true　to　myself？　It’s　impossible！”

As　I　said；　he　is　a　troubled　soul。

I　can　recall　being　eaten　with　envy。　It　made　me　feel　quite　ill。　The　object　was　a　girl　in　my　school：　blonde；　dynamic；　with　glittering　green　eyes。　Beyond　being　beautiful；　she　was　wonderfully　self…possessed。　What　else　could　a　teenager　wish　for？

Her　smugness　irritated　me　no　end。　She　was　so　radiant；　so　full　of　fun；　so　damned　pleased　with　life。　Everyone　adored　her；　except　me　and　a　few　others　equally　afflicted。

I　nearly　fainted　the　day　she　came　to　me　requesting；　would　I　be　her　friend？　Seemingly　sincere；　she　claimed　to　be　in　awe　of　my　prowess　in　the　classroom；　where　she　herself　had