第14部分(第1/7 頁)

Jesus　Saves。　He　had　stared　to　this；　an　awful　bitterness　in　his　heart；　wanting　to　curse—and　the　Spiritspoke；　and　spoke　in　him。　Yes：　there　was　Elisha；　speaking　from　the　floor；　and　his　father；　silent；　athis　back。　In　his　heart　there　was　a　sudden　yearning　tenderness　for　holy　Elisha；　desire；　sharp　andawful　as　a　reflecting　knife；　to　usurp　the　body　of　Elisha；　and　lie　where　Elisha　lay；　to　speak　intongues；　as　Elisha　spoke；　and；　with　that　authority；　to　confound　his　father。　Yet　this　had　not　been　themoment；　it　was　as　far　back　as　he　could　go；　but　the　secret；　the　turning；　the　abysmal　drop　was　fartherback；　in　darkness。　As　he　cursed　his　father；　as　he　loved　Elisha；　he　had；　even　then；　been　weeping；　hehad　already　passed　his　moment；　was　already　under　the　power；　had　been　struck；　and　was　goingdownAh；　down！—and　to　what　purpose；　where？　To　the　bottom　of　the　sea；　the　bowels　of　the　earth；to　the　heart　of　the　fiery　furnace？　Into　a　dungeon　deeper　than　Hell；　into　a　madness　louder　than　thegrave？　What　trumpet　sound　would　awaken　him；　what　hand　would　lift　him　up？　For　he　knew；　as　hewas　struck　again；　and　screamed　again；　his　throat　like　burning　ashes；　and　as　he　turned　again；　hisbody　hanging　from　him　like　a　useless　weight；　a　heavy；　rotting　carcass；　that　if　he　were　not　lifted　hewould　never　rise。

His　father；　his　mother；　his　aunt；　Elisha—all　were　far　above　him；　waiting；　watching　historment　in　the　pit。　They　hung　over　the　golden　barrier；　singing　behind　them；　light　around　theirheads；　weeping；　perhaps；　for　John；　struck　down　so　early。　And；　no；　they　could　not　help　him　anymore—nothing　could　help　him　any　more。　He　struggled；　struggle　to　rise　up；　and　meet　them—hewanted　wings　to　fly　upward　and　meet　them　in　that　morning；　that　morning　where　they　were。　But　hisstruggles　only　thrust　him　downward；　his　cries　did　not　go