第41部分(第3/7 頁)

　I　shut　off　the　gas　and　lifted　the　mask。　She　came　back　from　a　long　way　away。

〃That　was　lovely；　darling。　Oh；　you're　so　good　to　me。〃

〃You　be　brave；　because　I　can't　do　that　all　the　time。　It　might　kill　you。〃

〃I'm　not　brave　any　more；　darling。　I'm　all　broken。　They've　broken　me。　I　know　it　now。〃

〃Everybody　is　that　way。〃

〃But　it's　awful。　They　just　keep　it　up　till　they　break　you。〃

〃In　an　hour　it　will　be　over。〃

〃Isn't　that　lovely？　Darling；　I　won't　die；　will　I？〃

〃No。　I　promise　you　won't。〃

〃Because　I　don't　want　to　die　and　leave　you；　but　I　get　so　tired　of　it　and　I　feel　I'm　going　to　die。〃

〃Nonsense。　Everybody　feels　that。〃

〃Sometimes　I　know　I'm　going　to　die。〃

〃You　won't。　You　can't。〃

〃But　what　if　I　should？〃

〃I　won't　let　you。〃

〃Give　it　to　me　quick。　Give　it　to　me！〃

Then　afterward；　〃I　won't　die。　I　won't　let　myself　die。〃

〃Of　course　you　won't。〃

〃You'll　stay　with　me？〃

〃Not　to　watch　it。〃

〃No；　just　to　be　there。〃

〃Sure。　I'll　be　there　all　the　time。〃

〃You're　so　good　to　me。　There；　give　it　to　me。　Give　me　some　more。　It's　not　working！〃

I　turned　the　dial　to　three　and　then　four。　I　wished　the　doctor　would　e　back。　I　was　afraid　of　the　numbers　above　two。

Finally　a　new　doctor　came　in　with　two　nurses　and　they　lifted　Catherine　onto　a　wheeled　stretcher　and　we　started　down　the　hall。　The　stretcher　went　rapidly　dOwn　the　hall　and　into　the　elevator　where　every　one　had　to　crowd　against　the　wall　to　make　room；　then　up；　then　an　open　door　and　out　of　the　elevator　and　down　the　hall　on　rubber　wheels　to　the　operating　room。　I　did　not　recognize　the　doctor　with　his　cap　and　mask　on。　There　was　another　doctor　and　more　nurses。

〃They've　got　to　give　me　something