第94部分(第5/7 頁)

　before my eyes： He was

burnishing　paper　to　a　high　gloss　by　rubbing　it　quickly　with　a　smooth　seashell

as　the　sunlight；　ing　through　an　open　window　on　a　summer’s　day；　struck

his　naked　honey…colored　forearms。　For　a　moment　he　stopped　what　he　was　so

absentmindedly　doing　and　carefully　lowered　his　face　to　the　page　to　examine　a

blemish。 After making a few passes over the offending spot with the

burnishing shell using different motions； he returned to his former pattern；

moving his hand back and forth as he stared out of the window into the

distance；　losing　himself　in　daydreams。　I　shall　never　forget　how　before　looking

outside again； he briefly gazed into my eyes—as I would later do to others。

This dolorous look has only one meaning； which all apprentices know quite

well：　Time　doesn’t　flow　if　you　don’t　dream。

414

I　WILL　BE　CALLED　A　MURDERER

You’d forgotten about me； hadn’t you？ Why should I conceal my presence

from you any longer？ For speaking in this voice； which is gradually getting

stronger and stronger； has bee irresistible for me。 At times； I restrain

myself　only　with　great　effort；　and　I’m　afraid　that　the　strain　in　my　voice　will

give　me　away。　At　times；　I　let　myself　go　pletely　unchecked；　and　that’s　when

those words； signs of my second character； which you might recognize； spill

from my lips； my hands begin to tremble； beads of sweat collect on my

forehead and I realize at once that these little whispers of my body； in turn；

will　furnish　new　clues。

Yet　I’m　so　very　content　here！　As　we　co