第45部分(第2/7 頁)

foreseen　coincidence…But　did　Hayriye　know？　Did　she　prehend　what　I’d

explained to her； will she understand？ Indeed； yes； she’d quickly understand

and　grow　suspicious。　I　hugged　her　even　tighter；　but　I　knew　that　with　her　slave

girl’s mind she’d assume I was doing this to cover up my wiles； and before

long　even　I　felt　as　if　I　were　deceiving　her。　While　my　father　was　being　murdered

here；　I　was　with　Black　engaged　in　an　act　of　lovemaking。　If　it　were　only　Hayriye

who knew this； I wouldn’t feel as guilty； but I suspect that you might make

something　of　it　as　well。　So；　admit　it；　you　believe　that　I’m　hiding　something。

Alas；　poor　woman！　Could　my　fate　be　any　darker？　I　began　to　cry；　then　Hayriye

cried；　and　we　embraced　again。

I　pretended　to　satisfy　my　hunger　at　the　table　we’d　set　upstairs。　From　time

to　time；　with　the　excuse　of　“checking　on　Grandfather；”　I　would　step　into　the

other　room　and　burst　into　tears。　Later　because　the　children　were　scared　and

agitated； they snuggled up tightly next to me in bed。 For a long while they

were　unable　to　sleep　for　fear　of　jinns；　and　as　they　tossed　and　turned　they　kept

asking；　“I　heard　a　noise；　did　you　hear　it？”　To　lull　them　to　sleep；　I　promised　to

tell　them　a　love　story。　You　know　how　words　take　wing　in　the　darkness。

“Mother；　you’re　not　going　to　get　married　are　you？”　said　Shevket。

“Listen　to　me；”　I　said。　“There　was　a　prince　who；　from　afar；　fell　in　love　with　a

strikingly beautiful maiden。 How did this happen？ I’ll tell you how。 Before

laying　eyes　on　the　pretty　maiden；　he’d　seen　her　portrait；　that’s　how。”

As　I　would　often　do　when　I　was　upset　and　tro