第15部分(第3/7 頁)

　burning　epistle　meant　less　to　her　than　it　did　to　me。

It　was　four　pages　long；　I　thought　I　would　never　write　anything　longer　in　my　life；　and　now　look　at　this。　All　this；　and　the　end　still　not　in　sight。　If　I'd　known　the　story　was　going　to　go　on　this　long；　I　might　never　have　started。　What　I　didn't　realize　was　how　many　doors　the　act　of　writing　unlocks；　as　if　my　Dad's　old　fountain　pen　wasn't　really　a　pen　at　all；　but　some　strange　variety　of　skeleton　key。　The　mouse　is　probably　the　best　example　of　what　I'm　talking　about　…　Steamboat　Willy；　Mr。　Jingles；　the　mouse　on　the　Mile。　Until　I　started　to　write；　I　never　realized　how　important　he　（yes；　he）　was。　The　way　he　seemed　to　be　looking　for　Delacroix　before　Delacroix　arrived；　for　instance　…　I　don't　think　that　ever　occurred　to　me；　not　to　my　conscious　mind；　anyway；　until　I　began　to　write　and　remember。

I　guess　what　I'm　saying　is　that　I　didn't　realize　how　far　back　I'd　have　to　go　in　order　to　tell　you　about　John　Coffey；　or　how　long　I'd　have　to　leave　him　there　in　his　cell；　a　man　so　huge　his　feet　didn't　just　stick　off　the　end　of　his　bunk　but　hung　down　all　the　way　to　the　floor。　I　don't　want　you　to　forget　him；　all　right？　I　want　you　to　see　him　there；　looking　up　at　the　ceiling　of　his　cell；　weeping　his　silent　tears；　or　putting　his　arms　over　his　face。　I　want　you　to　hear　him；　his　sighs　that　trembled　like　sobs；　his　occasional　watery　groan。　These　weren't　the　sounds　of　agony　and　regret　we　sometimes　heard　on　E　Block；　sharp　cries　with　splinters　of　remorse　in　them；　like　his　wet　eyes；　they　were　somehow　removed　from　the　pain　we　were　used　to　dealing　with。　In　a　way　…　I　know　how　crazy　this　will　sound；　of　course　I　do；　but　there　is　no　sense　in　writing　something　as　long　as　this　if　you　can't　say　what　feels　true　to　your　heart　…　in　a　way　it　was　as　if　it