第28部分(第3/7 頁)

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her　fulness；　and　was　sooner　ready　to　enjoy　again　a　return　to　the

outside　world。　She　was　going　to　give　a　tea…party。　His　heart

sank。　He　wanted　to　go　on；　to　go　on　as　they　were。　He　wanted　to

have　done　with　the　outside　world；　to　declare　it　finished　for

ever。　He　was　anxious　with　a　deep　desire　and　anxiety　that　she

should　stay　with　him　where　they　were　in　the　timeless　universe　of

free；　perfect　limbs　and　immortal　breast；　affirming　that　the　old

outward　order　was　finished。　The　new　order　was　begun　to　last　for

ever；　the　living　life；　palpitating　from　the　gleaming　core；　to

action；　without　crust　or　cover　or　outward　lie。　But　no；　he　could

not　keep　her。　She　wanted　the　dead　world　again…she　wanted　to　walk

on　the　outside　once　more。　She　was　going　to　give　a　tea…party。　It

made　him　frightened　and　furious　and　miserable。　He　was　afraid　all

would　be　lost　that　he　had　so　newly　e　into：　like　the　youth　in

the　fairy　tale；　who　was　king　for　one　day　in　the　year；　and　for

the　rest　a　beaten　herd：　like　Cinderella　also；　at　the　feast。　He

was　sullen。　But　she　blithely　began　to　make　preparations　for　her

tea…party。　His　fear　was　too　strong；　he　was　troubled；　he　hated

her　shallow　anticipation　and　joy。　Was　she　not　forfeiting　the

reality；　the　one　reality；　for　all　that　was　shallow　and

worthless？　Wasn't　she　carelessly　taking　off　her　crown　to　be　an

artificial　figure　having　other　artificial　women　to　tea：　when　she

might　have　been　perfect　with　him；　and　kept　him　perfect；　in　the

land　of　intimate　connection？　Now　he　must　be　deposed；　his　joy

must　be　destroyed；　he　must　put　on　the　vulgar；　shallow　death　of

an　outward　existence。

He　ground　his　soul　in