第5部分(第2/7 頁)

d　Granddad；　trying　to　pick　up　on　why

we　were　miffed　at　each　other。

Not　that　he　had　anything　to　be　miffed　at　me　about。　What　had　I　done　to　him；　anyway？　Nothing。

Nada。　But　he　was；　I　could　tell。　And　I　pletely

avoided　looking　at　him　until　about　halfway　through　dinner；　when　I　sneaked　a　peek。

He　was　studying　me；　all　right。　And　even　though　it　wasn't　a　mean　stare；　or　a　hard　stare；　it　was；

you　know；　firm。　Steady。　And　it　weirded　me　out。

What　was　his　deal？

I　didn't　look　at　him　again。　Or　at　my　mother。　I　just　went　back　to　eating　and　pretended　to　listen

to　my　dad。　And　the　first　chance　I　got；　I　excused　myself

and　holed　up　in　my　room。

I　was　planning　to　call　my　friend　Garrett　like　I　usually　do　when　I'm　bent　about　something。　I

even　punched　in　his　number；　but　I　don't　know。　I　just　hung

up。And　later　when　my　mom　came　in；　I　faked　like　I　was　sleeping。　I　haven't　done　that　in　years。

The　whole　night　was　weird　like　that。　I　just　wanted　to　be

left　alone。

Juli　wasn't　at　the　bus　stop　the　next　morning。　Or　Friday　morning。　She　was　at　school；　but　you'd

never　know　it　if　you　didn't　actually　look。　She　didn't　whip

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her　hand　through　the　air　trying　to　get　the　teacher　to　call　on　her　or　charge　through　the　halls

getting　to　class。　She　didn't　make　unsolicited　ments　for

the　teacher's　edification　or　challenge　the　kids　who　took　cuts　in　the　milk　line。　She　just　sat。

Quiet。

I　told　myself　I　should　be　glad　about　it　—　it　was　like　she　wasn't　even　there；　and　isn't　that　what

I'd　always　wanted？　But　still；　I　felt　bad。　About　her　tree；

about　how　she　hurried　off　to　eat　by　herself　in　the　library　at　lunch；　about　how　her　eyes　were

red　around　th